When people ask we typically say we are elated, and that is completely true. However, on days like today when Roland and I are sick and both kids just want to be held I wonder if I will be good enough to fit them all in when the time comes.
After we had Hazel we were told it was highly unlikely we will have another child, and if I did get pregnant survival past the first trimester is about 30%. Considering I have already had three miscarriages and the numerous health issues involving my reproductive organs we thought two was it. And we were grateful. How many people get the chance to have two children? Let alone a boy AND a girl.
So while this is unexpected, we won't be complaining about any of it... we might stress out about the fact that the car we bought in January won't fit a third car seat, or that I gave away all of my maternity clothes, our newborn essentials, and most of our baby clothes when we were moving. I might cry at the grocery store because there isn't really a way to fit three kids under three and groceries into a cart. And we might shake our heads as we try to configure a space for the new baby to sleep.
But, all of it is done with a sense of gratitude that we get another chance at pregnancy, and a newborn and all that comes with it. Our above stressers are pretty superficial. I know people who have twin toddlers and are expecting another set, and even a few with triplets. They all get my kudos and awe.
Wednesday we got to see our baby moving around and hiding from the ultrasound for almost a full hour (gotta love an in depth sonogram). And in the next few weeks we have to go in for more in depth genetic testing (Is it wrong that I am excited to talk to a geneticist? Simply because I find their job fascinating...). We still don't have a name, but we have another baby and that is something we are all too happy for.