Thursday, August 25, 2011

my plans and life always seem to find a way to conflict...

this was the list I made at the beginning of the summer of things I wanted to do:

1. a salsa garden (even if it is in a planter on my deck)
2. finding a desk and shelves for our office... and then painting them bright red
3. sewing a skirt
4. reading through Les Miserables and Jesus the Christ
5. putting the finishing touches on our apartment
6. finishing up a PD Bio class (online)
7. making a trip out to the midwest
8. finding some curtains for the study or learning to sew some
9. celebrating our 1 year anniversary
10. lots of outdoor activities

this is a list of things I actually did:
1. Work. A LOT more than I thought I would. I am not sure why I forget during the school year how much work I have to do in the summer (maybe because I enjoy school a titch more...) but I do, and I always think I won't be completely exhausted at the end of the day when in reality I usually am. I made homemade salsa, and tortilla chips, and guacamole. baby steps.

2. We made the "office" into a guest bedroom, for a semi-permanent guest

3. I bought a few skirts off the clearance rack... I still want to sew that skirt though.

4. I read though Les Mis and started Jesus the Christ. I also read a few other short reads... There's always Christmas break, right?

5. I suppose I can mark the finishing touches off, although the husband mainly did this one

6. There was no time... at all, for school. Instead I spent more family time, cleaned a little, and started exercising again. I regret nothing.

7. We drove to Oklahoma to take my parents a car that they bought out here. I don't want to sound like I am whining, but the drive was horrendous. The company, much better. I was sad we didn't have time to see Gabe's familia, (he was in the middle of a semester and it was a very short trip) but we will see them before we ring in the New Year.

8. So uhh, the semi-permanent guest still doesn't have curtains in their room.... Looks like we're taking a trip to Ross/Target tonight.

9. Husband and I most certainly did celebrate our 1 year, I loved it.

10. I walked around town a lot... does that count?

Monday, August 22, 2011

sometimes you just can't go back

this morning I am looking up flight for one of the artists for the benefit concert who is moving beforehand

this afternoon I will be calling people (adults, people with kids and real jobs and lives) and seeing how things are going with what I have delegated to them.

this is all new to me. I am still used to adults telling me what to do. I am not used to scheduling flights and negotiating and dressing pretty, to act professionally and then having something this important be on the line.

this morning Gabe is taking Adam to school, helping him find his way around classes and get ready for the new school year.

when did we become such adults? when did we start to have appointments and phone conferences and meetings? I received a fax today, about business. strange.

there are a lot of adult things that I have been doing for a long time, but these certain things all seem new and different to me. and I am grateful.

this benefit concert has changed me, it has helped me begin to see my potential. it has made me realize that there is so much more I can be doing with my life, even while going to school. I have been thanked numerous times for helping with things, but in all sincerity I feel as if I need to thank others for this opportunity.

and while I am doing all of these 'adult' tasks no worries, I am still taking time to do things like stay up until 1am playing Super Mario with my husband and little brother, listening to music, getting into wrestling matches, and being giddy around the guy I'm crushing on (the husband...)

I like that I am beginning to find a balance in my life, hopefully I continue to improve in that area because I am almost positive I will never fully grow up.

I am also perfectly okay with that.

Friday, August 19, 2011


for the first time I used google translate and wished I hadn't / I am making a food menu for the next few weeks, school is definitely just around the corner/ I will be working on the benefit concert quite a bit/ I cannot stop yawning/ construction workers broke another water line on campus, last time this happened we spent out Thanksgiving vacation cleaning up and then being sick afterword. this time we won't be cleaning it up and hopefully no buildings will be affected/ should be shorter than not... Enjoy your weekend!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

homemade guacamole and zip lines

this past week Gabe and I went to Park City to celebrate our one year anniversary. there were a few glitches in us trying to get out of town (the car broke down, the bank thought my card was stolen, and as always we were running late, enough that the hotel almost didn't let us check in) but other than that it was quite enjoyable:

-husband got me this amazing necklace I have been eying for months (this is notable for two reasons;
1. I am usually not a fan of jewelry 2. even when I am, Gabe rarely notices)

-we discovered down town Park City, which reminds me a lot of down town Anchorage. If we ever have to live in Utah after we graduate, I think I could survive in Park City

-we ate at local restaurants, mostly it was quite tasty. I tried watermelon soup, which was interesting, but not enough to make me want it again. I also tried mashed cauliflower, which made me gag (but because I have been trained to do so, I tried at least three bites), Gabe was a grown up and ate a little bit more of it

-we ate the most delicious waffle cones (and the ice cream shop actually had sorbet so I could eat it as well)

-we toured the Olympic park, saw athletes training for the winter Olympics, took ridiculous pictures in a bobsled and went on a ridiculously tall zip line

                                     (no that isn't us on the zipline, I just wanted you to see how high up it is)

-we went swimming which consisted of us jumping from hot tub, to freezing cold pool, to the sauna, back to the hot tub and the pool several times over (it was quite chilly, but later we learned that was because it was fresh mountain water, which made me feel a bit more rustic)

- we drove around, got lost a few times, sang to the radio and enjoyed time just us. the only thing I didn't like about this trip was coming home.

Today on our actual anniversary we did the usual Sunday thing (which consists of sleeping in and making a real breakfast unlike every other day of the week, and then church and some family time) but we also made homemade chips, guacamole and salsa. yumm.

I am full of food and love.

(sorry for the lack of pictures... we forgot the camera)

a funeral

the past week was a flurry of emotions for me. and while I am grateful for each one some were more pleasant than others.

Thursday was Jada Mortensen's funeral. To say that was difficult would be an understatement, to see those I love dearly hurt so much, hurts me much more than my own ever could. Andy and James came to pick us up because our car was in the shop (more on this later) and hey, it's better to car pool.

In true form, we were almost late but not quite. The first people I saw who I knew were the grandparents. these are people who have welcomed me into their home, letting us stay up far too late doing things like painting in the driveway at 4am. Alyssa's grandpa has given me numerous priesthood blessings and a nickname. and there they were, both red eyed and tearful.

Then I heard Bridian's (a sister) graicous voice thanking people for coming and for caring about their family so much. I saw Nicole (the mom) beautiful, and elegant in a blue dress. I have never seen anyone so well put together at their own child's funeral. but then again, I wasn't surprised.

I heard awe-inspiring Jace tell of the loss of his best friend and the kind of person she helped him want to become. I heard Alyssa's voice through her sister as Bridian read a letter written from Lyss on her mission in Portugal. I heard two sweet young girls sing of the truth they know of Jesus Christ and His return. I heard a heartbroken mother speak of her child. A woman who lost so much in this last year who is still so willing to follow the plan God has for her. Once again, I was not surprised. I was in turn inspired to become a better person through their example. I saw my friends and husband who hurt so much for Alyssa and her family.I felt the Spirit so strongly testify that Jada and her family will once again be reunited.

After the funeral, before the burial, I finally got to speak to her grandparents. all the tears I had been holding back came rushing. Hugs were given and I think I accidentally got snot on his suit...

It was a sunny bright day, I saw so many friends and learned what faith in adversity really means. I think Jada would be pleased with the outcome.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

three hundred and sixty-five....

our anniversary is coming up, the big one year. 

I know some of you ... okay anyone who has been married at least five years, are probably thinking big deal. but this is a big deal for us, just like next year and the next and the next....

and it makes me think back to this time last year when so many people who love us came together and sacrificed time, sleep and other things to help us have that perfect day, and we will forever be grateful. each year when I think back on the promises we made I will remember the loved ones who surrounded us, and those who wish they could have been there.

thank you, each one of you for being a part of the best thing that has ever happened to me; marrying Gabe.

who knew these two immature, goofy freshman would get married...

I think we did, at least a little bit. when we were younger we used to joke around about kids, and where to live, and what kind of car we wanted and how we should just run away together. we were joking because we were freshman and he had a mission to go on and we both want college degrees...

but then... we realized that we wanted the same things and we wanted them together.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

last night I had this horrible dream where my friend whose sister recently passed away was asking my why I hadn't save her sister's life... I woke up around 4am and didn't really sleep after that.

this year has really been a mess. It is a lot more complicated however, I think it is sufficient to leave it at that.

I have learned a lot about myself as of late. who I am, who I want to become, what changes need to go into the transition...

I am excited to be back in school soon, spending more time working towards my career rather than spending dead time making money.

I am excited to see where my husband takes his time and talents... whoever gets them is going to be lucky.

mostly today, I am excited that we have a future and that the plan is ours to discover

Sunday, August 7, 2011

it has been a day...

most noticeable by the fact that it is well past midnight and I am still awake.

I found out that a plane had been shot down in Afghanistan. Immediately I thought of my brother who is stationed there, then of others I know in the military. When I found out it wasn't my brother there was a sigh of relief, a ping of guilt and finally sorrow for those who did loose their loved ones yesterday.

Our car overheated, which I thought cracked the engine. Thankfully it didn't (so grateful for in-laws who answer panicked phone calls) but we still have to take the car in.

and I spent a lot of the evening at the hospital with someone I love dearly. (yes, I am being vague on purpose and no there is no reason to worry.)

loving people is the source of my greatest and worst emotions. I just have to keep on reminding myself that being closed off isn't any better because then I don't get to experience those moments of joy.

don't worry my next post will be a little less melancholy. . .

there is much to be grateful for but tonight I needed to let some of this out